guys are not supposed to queef...right?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
