I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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