She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize