We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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