dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
