She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
