she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
