he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize