You're so nebulous sometimes
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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