i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
