I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
