dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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