she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
