literally had 100 drinks last night.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize