i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
He called his prostate his "boner button".
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
