last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
