he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
