we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I AM VODKA MAN
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
