This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
