Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
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Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
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