i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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