so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
