yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
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