id be glad to
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize