In the future we'll all be gay
The maid of honor just puked.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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