You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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