When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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