we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize