Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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