when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
i think i just lost a toe
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
