im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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