As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
