look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
