bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
