i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
