Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
