Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
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