Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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