She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
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