Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
