So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
