i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
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