the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
All I want is dick and wine.
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