it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
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