dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize