Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Randomize
