i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
The Olympian is in my bed
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
