You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
