so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
