Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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