She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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